I take my power back....

I wait for this signal to turn green on my scooter. It's nice and scorching. I am thinking whether it was a good idea to get my scooter and then I am interrupted by two men who navigate their way across us-the autos, cars, scooters, and bikes.They seem to be in a hurry to cross the road.

And in that hurry, the shoulder of the man hits against my mirror. I was concerned about him and his shoulder and also for my mirror. Before I could allow my next thought to pop up, this man turns behind and tries to stare at me through my sunglasses and the scarf that covered my face. He was soooooooooo angry.

Anyways, he walked away and I started popping thoughts in my mind again about what exactly did that stare mean. He was the one who was in a hurry and before I could think he stared again in anger and frowned as much as he could. His stare conveyed to me that I was responsible for the pain that he was feeling on his shoulder.

And then, I was waiting there getting into a justification mode to my own self that he should look and walk. He can't blame me. I was just beginning to get angry.

And then came another thought-
Reena, he passed the blame to you.
And you passed it to him.
Do you want to stay in this circle of blame?
Do you want to allow others to trigger you?
And then I smiled thinking how I give my power to anyone...
And I took my power back... and told myself
My dear friend- I allow you to stare and frown at me. Thanks for letting me know how to be more mindful of my emotions.....and I allowed myself to return back to my centre waiting for the light to turn green...

Comments

I believe in angels...something good in everything I see......

Ever since I was a little girl, I remember asking the universe (Waheguru/God/Allah/Almighty) for signs for everything I did in my life..... The universe is very very systematic in which nothing happens just by accident or just by chance or coincidence. Everything is for a reason which is what I believe..... My relation with the universe has grown just the way I have grown. The signs that the universe sends are mysterious and I always marvel at the ways things are communicated by the source. So now, I have decided to shift my Andheri centre of Khushi to a new place. The day I went for a meeting, angels sent me signs that I was on the right track and divinely guided. Next, I decided to get the place done before we shift and then came a series of things that have left my mouth wide open every time they happened. In my first visit I was finalising the contractor to get the repairs work done for the flat and was a little worked up. And there I saw a white butt...

Grieving.... or learning and growing ???

As I start writing these lines, I can listen to the wind gushing and the leaves rustling, sometimes scaring me and sometimes nourishing my soul. It is a very wet day today and there is water logging everywhere and also Ganpati Visarjan. These days take me back to the times when I and my sister were very little. My dad didn’t work on the days that there was Visarjan. I was hardly 10 years old and my sister barely 5. There we were near the beach at Seven Bunglows shivering to the wind that was slapping us while the rain lashed us till we were drenched along with mom and dad. And these memories keep coming back. Seeing one ganpati after the other, ready for Visarjan. I used to be mesmerized by the artist’s ability to carve such a beautiful form that the eyes of Ganpati would speak. I still remember those days when my dad also took me on his cycle’s back seat. Oh!!! How much I miss (no I think I remember) those days. There is this emotional pain which I fe...

Shudh desi feelings......

You know what sometimes I love to cry when I see sad movies... I initially used to think that I am so funny... But I really loved crying and felt light after that....so light.... and I love this quality about me...the tears are real... 100% pure....Shudh desi tears... I laugh a lot too when I watch movies... Too much...still remember the days when I and my sister would laugh on the stupidest of the joke and my dad used to shout at us... “Does anyone else laugh so loudly around here in our neighborhood?” We would look at each other, become quiet for a millisecond and be back to even louder laughter....while dad would look at us in frustration and his eyes would go towards our mom pleading her to control this laughing monster who was inside us. And we still laugh even today while mine and her husband exchange glance with each other when the laughing gas is in the room.... we laugh till we start crying!!! It is such a wonderful exercise !!! It feels like running...

thecoolreena

Search This Blog